Social Work Vignette

SEVEN ACTIVE LISTENING TECHNIQUES

 

1. Minimal Encouragements Sounds made, especially on the phone, to let one person know the other is there and listening. Such as, “Oh?”, “When?”, and “Really?”. They are questions, comments, or sounds that do not interfere with the flow of conversation, but do let the subject know that he/she is being heard. They help build rapport and encourage the subject to continue talking.

 

2. Paraphrasing A summary in your own words of what you were told. Demonstrates listening, creates empathy and establishes rapport because it is evident that you have heard and understood. Usually, paraphrasing begins with the words, “Are you telling me…” or “Are you saying…” Paraphrasing also clarifies content, highlights issues and promotes give and take between you and the subject. It tends to make the subject a better listener.

 

3. Emotion Labeling This is often the first active listening skill to be used in a crisis communication incident. It is important to be attuned to the emotion behind the words and facts. Commonly, we all want to get into problem-solving too early. Too early an approach to problem solving is doomed to failure because the subject is often not ready to reason and you have not listened enough to get all of the information you need to assist in problem solving. Common phrases for you to use are, “You sound…”, “You seem…” , “I hear…” (emotion heard by you). You do not tell people how they are feeling, but how they sound to you as if they are feeling. Do not be concerned about making a mistake in labeling emotions. The subject will correct you and will often appear grateful for the attempt. Be aware of missing emotions and listen for conflicts in the feelings expressed, especially if they appear inappropriate to the situation.

 

 

4. Mirroring (or Reflecting)

This is the technique of repeating the last word or phrase and putting a question mark after it. This provides very exact responses because you are using the subject’s own words. Reflecting or mirroring asks for more input without guiding the direction of the subject’s thoughts. It is an effective way to let the subject know that you are listening and for the subject to “hear” what he/she is saying.

5. Open-Ended Questions The primary use of open-ended questions is to help a subject start talking. Asking open- ended questions encourages the person to say more without actually directing the conversation. They are questions that cannot be answered with a single word such as “yes” or “no”. Open-ended questions get information for you with fewer questions, those that usually begin with how, what, when and where. Note that “why” questions are not asked directly. “Why” questions tend to steer the conversation toward blame and shut down communication. “Why” questions also tend to pass judgment. Closed-end questions can give a feeling of interrogation that makes rapport building difficult. They also can prevent any additional information from being shared organically.

 

6. “I” Messages “I” messages let the subject know how he/she is making you feel, why you feel that way, and what the subject can do to remedy the situation. This is a non-threatening approach and does not put the subject on the defensive. “I” messages can be effective when communication is difficult because of the intense emotions being directed at you.

 

7. Effective Pauses Silence can be very effective on a number of levels. Most people are not comfortable with silence and will fill it with talk. It is to your advantage to keep the subject talking. Silence can also be used to emphasize a point. You can use silence just before or just after saying something significant or provocative.