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Running head: SMPP PART ONE 1

MY RELATIONAL STYLE 3

Abstract

This is a report of the description, development, and management skills of Marcus Butler. In this report, it will reveal a snap shot of the personality as outlined in the various people puzzles presented by the required texts. Using the course resources, the following questions will be answered: 1) Who is the Me I See; 2) What Hallmark Purpose will govern your relational style; and 3) Who is the Me I want to See? The engagement of these questions set the stage for further management of my particular relational style by using a research-based approach to support the assertions outlined.

Table of Contents Part 1 Data 3 Communications Skills Test 7 Professional/Leadership DISC Profile 9 How Others See You 11 SMPP Phase One Questions 11 References 15 Solving My People Puzzle: Part 1 Grading Rubric 16

Part 1 Data
Interview 1: Shawna

Identify and solicit a wise person for mentorship. This person should be willing to help you secure and support your personal and professional growth and development. Initially, it will only involve helping you complete this assignment:

1) What would you tell Marcus if he asked you the following question: “What is it like to be on the other side of me?”

Marcus is a motivated, inquisitive, go getter who uses every opportunity to maximize his balance. He is also a people pleaser and this at times causes conflict not only with himself although he won’t admit it, but with his family and with others that are in his world making requests of him, he must learn to say no.

2) How does Marcus typically interact with other people? Can you think of a recent example?

Marcus interacts with others in a positive manner; he is very friendly and even keeled. He is a natural leader who knows how to communicate well with others. Case and point, we have members from all age categories and emotions; and Marcus is able to come in with his infectious bubbly attitude and changes the atmosphere.

3) Have you ever been in a situation where you saw Marcus take on new tasks or roles? Describe this situation and what he did?

We’re always in situations where we see Marcus take on new tasks/roles. The most recent and touching for me is his role as our Armourbearer. Once he fully understood the Biblical understanding and application, he moved in with agility and heart. He’s still adapting, but we can feel the sincerity in his passion to do what God wants him to do, it’s not just for a title.

4) What has been a particularly demanding goal for Marcus to achieve?

I would say to be filled with the Holy Spirit.

5) When you observe Marcus, which of the following pictures come to mind?

LION X BEAVER☐ OTTER ☐ GOLDEN RETRIEVER ☐

Based on the explanations provided, I would have to play mix and match with each one of these animals provided as Marcus’ has highlighted strengths of a Lion, the Beaver, the Otter and the Golden Retriever; same goes with his weakness. However, when I first looked at the 4 choices; I automatically went to Lion because it is known that the Lion is known to be the most vicious and protective animal in the animal planet; the man Marcus is strong and protective; he will do anything to take care of those he love. He is passionate about learning and ministry, his weakness is responding to impulses. As the Lion that waits for his prey, Marcus is a very patient young man with charisma. The Lion remains on guard, yet stays occupied, Marcus stays guarded, yet is always involved in a project, whether it’s figuring out how to better his photography skills, work on his assignments, or figuring out gadgets

Interview 2: Sid

Assessments used in this course are helpful tools for understanding how a person tends to think, feel, and make decisions; yet, more information is needed to fully understand one’s actual, observable, behavior. A completed 360° Interview provides a student with fresh insight from those who know him/her well. It also provides a way to monitor his/her relational growth and development. A student has asked you to answer the following questions. Your answers do not have to be long, just clear and concise. If more room is needed, continue typing until all questions are answered to your satisfaction. To help this student, complete his/her assignment in timely fashion; please return this document within 1 days of receipt by email attachment.

1) What would you tell Marcus if he asked you the following question: “What is it like to be on the other side of me?”

Marcus is a spirited, and enthusiastic young man who goes above and beyond to achieve a level of standard that he exceeds his expectations. As Pastor Shawna Lathan stated he is a people pleaser and with that it causes him internal conflict as well as pain within the ministry that is inside of him.

2) How does Marcus typically interact with other people? Can you think of a recent example?

Marcus shows a smile every time that I see him; It makes me wonder at times what is truly going on inside of his mind – because I know that nothing is sunshine all the time. There is no one that I have witnessed him not being about to communication with. However, his positive attitude is infectious.

3) Have you ever been in a situation where you saw Marcus take on new tasks or roles? Describe this situation and what he did?

Trying to come up with different descriptions is a task in itself. There is nothing that we ask of Marcus that he will not try to do; however, he doesn’t know how to say enough is enough. He will work himself to the point of exhaustion.

4) What has been a particularly demanding goal for Marcus to achieve?

Just as Pastor Shawna stated, “I would say to be filled with the Holy Spirit”, is the most vital key.

5) When you observe Marcus, which of the following pictures come to mind?

LION X BEAVER☐ OTTER ☐ GOLDEN RETRIEVER ☐

Based on the explanations provided, I would have to play mix and match with each one of these animals provided as Marcus’ has highlighted strengths of a Lion, the Beaver, the Otter and the Golden Retriever; same goes with his weakness. I also automatically went to Lion because it is known that the Lion is known to be the most vicious and protective animal in the animal planet as Pastor Shawna stated, however, it is that natural leader that is inside of him that allows others to show their strengths as well. As the Lion that waits for his prey, Marcus is a very patient young man with charisma. Many of what Pastor Shawna has stated I can reiterate, however, the most striking aspects about Marcus is his love, passion, and willingness to learn.

Communications Skills Test
Snapshot

Strengths separator

You are very insightful

You are assertive when talking to others

spacer Potential strengths separator

You have average communication skills

You are relatively capable of communicating clearly to others

Your listening skills are average

You are relatively comfortable dealing with emotions

spacer Limitations separator

No limitations were detected

Communication is a skill that you can learn. It’s like riding a bicycle or typing. If you’re willing to work at it, you can rapidly improve the quality of every part of your life. ” – Brian Tracy

Communication is not simply choosing the right words – many factors come into play. It’s not uncommon to find ourselves able to communicate smoothly in one situation, but bumbling our way through another. The fact is that whether you are happy with your present communication skills, there is always room for improvement. Here are some useful strategies for understanding and being understood.

Professional/Leadership DISC Profile
Profile 1

Profile 2

Profile 3

Profile 4

Profile 5

How Others See You
“You think people expect you to be seen as someone who is popular, articulate, kind, and intelligent. You tend to be many things to many people, but you are not very decisive or determined. People don’t see you as competitive or serious about winning. You usually want to be successful at being popular, supporting others, and digging into facts. You really don’t care that much about who’s the boss. You just want everyone to be happy and close, so you can teach him or her new and exciting truths. You like to teach or speak publicly, so you can impart deep information and help lift others up. People see you mostly shining and sharing your talents and knowledge.” (Carbonell, 2011, p. 85)

SMPP Phase One Questions
Who is the “Me I See”? The Core Disc index is basically the blueprint to follow in order to identify what type of personality that you may encounter. They are broken down into “D”, active and task-oriented, which stands for directing, driving, demanding, domination, determined, decisive, and doing; “I”, active and people-oriented, which is inspiring, influencing, inducing, impressing, interactive, and interested in people; “C”, passive and task-oriented, which is cautious, competent, calculating, compliant, careful, and contemplative; and “S”, passive and people-oriented, which is steady, stable, shy, security-oriented, servant, submissive, and specialist. (Carbonell, 2011, p.16) The me I see is the one that is driving and decisive (D), inspiring and interactive (I), and steady and servant (S). With the results of the survey I am described as a combination of I, S, and C that is a more accurate picture of what I am.

Core needs for the me that I am would include interactivity with others, serving others, while being on guard to whatever may be thrown my way. My biggest motivation would be to be a servant to all those that need my help.

The strengths of who I am rest on the facts of humility and the concept of servitude. One of the more vital points of being a servant/leaders (Greenleaf, 2013) is the ability to point out your own strengths and weaknesses. I believe that in my weakest state I am at my strongest. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

When it comes to shortfalls or shortcomings there are plenty to choose from. However, the biggest one will be my wanting to please everyone. In my willingness to please, I will be blinded to the obvious things going on around me. Things such as being taken advantage of, emotional manipulation, and underhanded aggression. This fits perfectly in the example of “I”, which state, “You sometimes tend to be too optimistic and trusting. People often talk you into doing things because they know you want to please them. Your need to be well liked and popular sometimes causes you to go along with the crowd. You think people need for you to be emotional and loud when responding to important things. You are expected to be expressive, which may cause you to either say things that might hurt others or cause you to sound stupid. You sometimes use your words and emotional responses as weapons against those you think are opposed to you. (Carbonell, 2011, p. 28)

When it comes to interpersonal communication there is a fine line to tread when approaching someone or a group of individuals. While it is sometimes best to directly confront individual(s) with issues, beliefs, ideologies, etc., it may be counter productive is that person is not receptive. This is a harmful aspect of interpersonal communication. However, if we first listen, without defending, the atmosphere will be more conductive to positive communication. (Petersen, 2007, p. 107)

From looking at the responses of others, the me I see is confirmed in most areas that are visible to the public. I believe that the person that I have inside is what God and I have a relationship with. As counselors, it is okay to try to relate to those you are trying to help, however, there are certain things that cannot be divulged in order to maintain a level of order in the sharing of information. It is this restraint as a counselor that is one of our greatest assets.

What Hallmark Purpose* will govern your relational style? “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” (Philippians 2:3-4) It is in this statement that encompasses all that we are to do as not only leaders but as children of the most-high God, Jehovah. “Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve.” (Matthew 20:28) It is through this spirit of serving and humility that will shows those that you are helping or leading that you are real, truthful and have their best interest at heart.

Who is the “Me I want to See”? The me that I want to see is a servant that closely imitates my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. This may seem like a very general statement but Jesus embodies every single letter of the DISC model – thus that is the me that I want to see.

The most effective resources are pointed towards the things to guard against as well as those things that are often abused. I feel as though through the me that I see, if I can become as well rounded in the things that I resist against the most, there is no level of effective communication that I cannot achieve. Thus, through the Holy Spirit of the Living God, there is no one that cannot be helped.

References:
Carbonell, M (2011). How to Solve the People Puzzle: Understanding Personality Patterns. Published by Uniquely You Resources. Copyright 2011 by Dr. Mels Carbonell. Published in eBook format by eBookit.com. www.eBookit.com

Greenleaf, R. (2013). Butler University, Ten Principles of Servant. Copyright 2013 by Butler University, 4600 Sunset Ave., Indianapolis, IN 46208. http://www.butler.edu/volunteer/resources/principles-of-servant-leadership/

Solving My People Puzzle: Part 1 Grading Rubric
Student:

Criteria

Points Possible

Points Earned

Assessment Content & Organization

· 360° Interviews, Communication Skills SnapShot, and DISC SnapShots (Graphs 1 & 2: Preface, Charts, Descriptions, and Conclusions) were presented with sufficient organizational clarity

DISC Description

· Primary DISC index clearly identified and satisfactorily supported from the assessments and course resources

· Basic overview concisely described and satisfactorily supported with evidence from course resources

Overall “The Me I and Others See” Description

· Overall strengths identified and concisely described with evidence from course resources and assessments

· Overall shortcomings identified and concisely described with evidence from course resources and assessments

· Helpful/harmful interpersonal patterns identified and satisfactorily supported with evidence from course resources

· Minimal presence of judgment and critique

Development of the “The Me I Want to See” Picture

· Concise description of a “Hallmark Purpose” that guide development and management of relational style

· Crisp picture of the “The Me I Want to See” developed under the influence of Hallmark Purpose

· Biblical insight and course information supported the development of the “The Me I Want to See”

Readability and APA Style

· Spelling and grammar are correct.

· Sentences are complete, clear, and concise.

· In-text citations and References used appropriately and correctly.

Total:

100

Instructor’s Comments:

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